We randomly got a young lady’s dilemma and the thing “overed” us, so we want to share it with you for your thoughts and advice in the comments.
Hi, I’m Abena (not my real name) and I’m in a mess at the moment and I don’t know what else to do. I come from a very humble home. My mum has a shop in front of our home where she sells provisions. My dad is a carpenter. My parents hustled to take me and my four other siblings to school and being the firstborn, I’ve always been expected to set a good example for my siblings and things have been going well. Well, until I got into the university last year.
After putting in the work throughout SHS, I finally got the university of my dreams, Legon and I was determined to make it work. Somewhere along the line in level 100 first semester, I started dating my current boyfriend who is in level 300. He’s such a sweet person and I decided to have sex for the first time with him. Everything was going on well until his roommate sort of started moving to me.
At first, his advances were subtle. Random checkups here and there and commenting on my WhatsApp status leading to short conversations. I didn’t think much of it. He later started hitting me up so we could have full-blown conversations and actually calling me. My boyfriend was there but he isn’t one to talk on the phone. He would rather text and so while talking to his roommate on the phone, I use the student wifi to chat with him online.
“To be honest I loved the attention from both of them. I loved the fact that I was involved in something “dangerous”. I loved the thrill. I had phone sex with his roommate a number of times and I felt bad about it later but I convinced myself that I was doing nothing wrong and that everything was on the phone; it wasn’t physical… yet.”
This brings me to the reason why I reached out to you. This particular day, his roommate convinced me to come over to the room since my boyfriend was out and wouldn’t be back until late. After going back and forth for about an hour, he finally won me over. I was ready to make things physical. Just once of course. I was curious to know what I was missing. Was sex different with other people? I liked doing it with my boyfriend but was there something more I hadn’t yet experienced?
I went over and to cut the long story short, I was not impressed. I wasted sin. All the things he said on the phone were lies. I felt terrible about what I had done to my boyfriend and I felt even worse because it was raw. He came inside me. I planned on going to the pharmacy later so I went to my room. Less than 10 minutes after I got to my room, my boyfriend called me to come over. I was wondering if he had already found out and I kept praying the whole time I was going over. I got there and realised it was nothing. He had missed me and wanted us to hang out. One thing led to another and we were kissing and even though I tried to stop us from having sex, we still did. Raw. And he also came in me.
“After everything, I felt so dirty that I lied that I wasn’t feeling well just to go and wash down. I hated myself and I wanted the earth to swallow me. I was in a dark place for about a week then I pulled myself up and started going about my activities. I totally forgot to take a postpill.”
The problem now is that I haven’t had my period in 2 months. I’m afraid to take a pregnancy test but I feel different. I’m afraid of what I’ll see on the test. What do I do? I had sex with two different people on the same day and forgot to take a pill. Who is the father? Is it possible that because I’ve slept with my boyfriend a number of times even after that event, the sperm will be his? Can it work that way? Who do I even give the pregnancy to? Do I tell my boyfriend? What do I do?
Kindly share your thoughts in the comments section to help her dilemma.
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