Here’s What To Do If Your Partner’s Love Language Is Acts of Service

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We’ve spoken a lot about how to love your partner based on their love languages, words of affirmation, physical touch, quality time and receiving gifts thoroughly in the past weeks. The last love language we are covering today is that of the Acts of Service.

A lot of people tend to associate acts of service with household chores and menial tasks, however, this isn’t actually the case. At its core, an act of service is about someone going out of their way to meaningfully help and support the other person. If you can take the initiative to ease the burden off your partner, that’s you performing acts of service. Here’s what to know if this is how your partner likes to be loved.

1. Show, don’t tell

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It’s not about you saying that you want to do this or that. It’s about you taking the step to actually do whatever it is you said you would do. Remember, for people who want to be loved in this manner, actions speak far more than words.

2. Perform the actions like you mean it

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When you’re doing what you said you would do, don’t just mindlessly go through the motions. Show your partner you love them by focusing on your actions. No act is irrelevant to them whether it’s picking up after yourself, cooking or ordering food for them or even calling them immediately to them when you realise they’re not in the right frame of mind. With partners like this, you need to have an open mind about gender roles and try to get a broader perspective about your responsibilities to each other.

3. Ask your partner what they need

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Remember that everyone is different. What you think suffices as acts of service may not necessarily be what they actually want from you. Have a conversation so you’re both on the same page.

4. Don’t go overboard

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Instead of trying to do every little thing for your partner, do the things that are pressing and things that they want you to do for them. Being in a relationship with someone who wants this kind of love doesn’t mean you’re their servant. If your partner is asking you to do something that you’re uncomfortable with, let them know you cannot. Set some boundaries.

5. Embrace spontaneity

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Do something your partner would never expect that you would do for them. It shows that you’ve been listening to them and let’s them know that you care.

We hope these made things easier and clearer.


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