There is sort of an unspoken rule or about dating a friend’s ex that we want to address. A lot of people don’t even like to think about it because it raises a lot of eyebrows and brings up questions and sometimes, messes up your friendship.
What happens if you genuinely like this person and they like you too but you aren’t sure if your friend will be able to understand? The truth of the matter is that, you won’t know until you you have an open and honest chat with your friend about it. They may be unfazed about the whole situation or there’s the chance that, they’ll be angry about it.
In all of this, here are some things to consider before you decide to date a friend’s ex.
1. Your friendship may be over
There’s a 50/50 chance that your friend will have a hard time accepting your relationship. The next question to ask yourself is, “Is it worth it?”. If it is, you can go ahead with your relationship. If you’re not, maybe, you should take a step back and reevaluate the situation.
2. You should know the reason why your friend and their ex broke up
If the relationship ended amicably, it may not be a cause for alarm but if their relationship ended in terrible terms, especially with regards to infidelity, you may need to take your time. Your friend may even assume the ex was cheating on them with you.
3. Consider how long ago they broke up
There’s a difference between dating an ex from SHS and one from a month ago. Breakups take time and closure, dating a friend’s recent ex can seriously impede their ability to move on.
4. Is your friend over their ex?
Are they still hung up over what happened when they were dating? What is their reaction when you bring that ex up? Depending on the type of relationship they have, it may take them a while to get over. You’ll probably have to talk to your friend about the possibility of you and their ex being an item and listen to their response. Also, check their body language and tone of their voice since they may be holding back their actual feelings and telling you things they want you to hear.
This is a really uncomfortable situation to be in especially when you think their ex is the perfect person for you and you both just click. Try to be a good friend but if your friend doesn’t want to be mature about the situation, maybe, you should just go ahead and do what will make you happy.
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