Today’s anonymous contributor is a 25 year old female called Miss X who is a University student in Ghana.
To me, I see celibacy as a form of purity; keeping yourself for whatever reason. At first, I used to think that it was very necessary to get married as a virgin but I’ve noticed that in our time it’s very different. Personally, I choose to be celibate because, first of all, for purity sake as a Christian I think that if I engage in any of these things it’s going to affect my relationship with God and I wouldn’t want that.
“Secondly, my virginity is really really important to me. It’s like a prized possession I have and giving it away in a relationship that I don’t know how it will end is not worth it and I prefer to keep it until marriage.”
The third reason is that I’m in school and there are a lot of sexually transmitted illnesses around. I know there’s protection but there are still a lot of sexually transmitted illnesses around. There’s no protection for your mouth when you kiss since you can transfer STIs that way as well. I feel like the diseases that can be transferred to me are very serious and I do not want that and so I prefer to just abstain.
“Also, no protection is 100% and I don’t want the situation where I could get pregnant and I would even be considering abortion or will have to be a single mother because a baby right now would disrupt all my plans. I’m still in school. I want to focus on my education. I don’t want any distractions.”
I stay celibate by not having any sexual relations with anyone including kissing and so currently I’m not in any relationship. In my previous relationship, me not wanting to do anything sexually was a big deal and it really affected it. It’s really not easy being celibate especially when you’re in a relationship with someone who wants it but you don’t want to. At a point, you’ll realise that you want to compromise and it will hurt you because it’s really not something you want to do and this is one of the challenges I face. The fact that now, among many of us, it has become a common thing and it’s like if you’re not doing it, you’re not part of the cool people sort of.
“Another challenge is that of late, there is a lot of sexual content around especially in movies. Sometimes if you’re on social media, there are some pop-ups that appear on your screen with a lot of sexual content which can tempt you.”
Also, considering our cycles as ladies too, there are certain times where we feel really horny. Sometimes my hormones make me feel like I’m going crazy but I try to keep it under control.
What keeps me going in this celibacy journey is my goal in life; where I want to see myself. Plus sex is really not something that I want to do right now. I don’t want to be somewhere in life and one random guy will bring up a video with a story that he has slept with me several times. I wouldn’t like that so yeah.
My relationship with God is number one to me and even though there are some ups and downs with that, I’m never going to compromise it and that’s also what keeps me going. Plus, people have done it and I know I can do it too so that encourages me as well.
The Kuulpeeps Relationship Series is a weekly series that explores different aspects of sex life through the eyes of our anonymous contributors. For the next few weeks we are focusing on Celibacy. If you want to share your story with us kindly fill this anonymous form.
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