Some of us have said some of the worst things to friends and family members because we probably heard people use those lines on TV or we’ve heard other people use it. The truth of the matter is that these things don’t help anyone feel better but yourself.
Check out some of the statements to not make to someone who is grieving.
1. God gives and God takes
2. They’re in a better place
3. You need to be strong for….
4. I know how you feel
5. There’s a reason for everything
6. You need to put this behind you and try to move on
7. Heaven needed another angel
8. God wanted him more than you
9. They wouldn’t want you to be so sad
10. He/she did what they had to do and it was time for them to go
All these responses are controlling and quite judgmental. You don’t need to control how they’re reacting. You just need to be there for them. Hand them water to drink cuz chances are they wouldn’t be able to eat. You can say these instead: “I’m so sorry for your loss”, “I don’t know what to say but I’m here for you”, “I don’t know how you feel but I’m going to keep you in my thoughts and prayers”.
The most you can do is to be with them and talk to them and help keep their minds off it. The truth is that the tears will come and when they do, just be there so they can hold on to you for support.
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