Valentine’s Day is tomorrow and…
Some of us are not ready for it at all!
For those who have been unfortunate enough to get baes lol you know you have to do some splurges tomorrow and Lord knows you’re not ready cos you’re really broke or your mind no dey to spend any money so…. here are a couple of excuses you can use to get out of any unnecessary expenditure…
Valentine’s day Unbeliever
“Valentine’s day is just a waste of time babe. I don’t believe in it and I don’t understand why you have to pick one day to show your love! I mean, I can show you, my love, any day right?”
Investment gone wrong
“Babes I wanted to buy this really amazing gift for you but…you know the Menzgold issue. All of my money was invested there and nooooww… it’s all gone! Thunder fire Nam1!! (shed some tears while you’re at it dear, the game is the game)”
“Herh I wanted to buy you an iPhone XS Max. I even spoke to the guy selling the phone but I didn’t have enough money so, I decided to use the money to place a bet on the Chelsea match so I could get more money but…Chelsea lost terribly and all my money….gone!”
Just put your phone off or block bae and then, later in the day, call him or her back and talk about how the network has been so shitty!! “I’m so stressed omg I sent you messages and tried making calls!! I even called their customer service several times”
“Ah wait what? Today is Valentine’s? Ah you’re lying!! Today is 12th! It’s not? Eiiiii herh I’ve been so busy sweedy, I forgot kraaa that today was 14th. I’m so sorry I’ll make it up to you!”
Pretend you’re sick. Keep sneezing in between sentences, sprinkle some cough all over the conversation and talk about the fever you think you have. If they don’t baby you and say “Know what? Forget about Valentine’s day plans…lemme come take care of you”, you have no business dating them charle!
It’s the 13th. You have a few hours to get moody and bitchy on bae. Make sure you fight!!!!!! Pick a fight and hang up angrily and let it last all of tomorrow too. Nobody expects a gift from an angry boo.
If you’re employed, use it to your advantage!!! Talk about how busy you are and how your boss won’t do anything without you! Make up a project dear, talk about how it has consumed all your time and you’d probably be working late anyways to make it to any date mpo!
If any of these don’t work…don’t come looking for us!
All the best!