Breakups? we have all experienced it.. how many times? Well that one is a personal problem, but what we do know is that every post break- up routine is the same for girls. If you are a girl reading this, we know you find at least 5 of these 10 things listed below relatable AF
1. Overspending: On any and everything, like literally. Starting with new bed sheets (well, we can’t sleep in ones that remind us of him, can we?) followed by the edgy new hairstyle. 300 Ghs down and we feel sooo much better… NOT!!.
2. Drinks: A lot!!!!. When we’re not drinking, we’re sending the wine glass emoji, followed by a question mark, to everybody in our contacts.
3. Stock up on snacks: Listen, the appetite no dey, we can’t handle full course meals right now, so King Crackers or some small Kelewele will have to count as dinner. And, OK, maybe some small yogurt.
4. Tries to be ‘fine’ way too soon: So you start making plans in your head like Step 1: Plan one HELL of a night out to celebrate our single girl status. Step 2: Begin crying at 9pm into our wine or Smirnoff. Sigh
5. Tells lies. When he texts to check on you and you hit him with the, “Sorry, whose number is this?” Yup, really mature.(but do we care.. nope) *Slow clap*
6. Tries to be friends with him: Spoiler Alert: it never happens (or at least, not straight away anyway it will take time). Stop trying to be cool and just spend the month hating him and everything he stands for already.
7. Uploads those shady relationships quotes via IG: An example being ‘Trust? Years to earn, seconds to break’. lol just as petty as you want to be and it’s fine sis, do you…
8. Turns cyber-stalker: “Who’s that girl he’s just befriended on Facebook”? “Who’s in his new profile pic”? Why has he suddenly started tweeting? and posting pictures
9. Drunk-texts him. You know, totally consistent things, like, “Heeey, I miss you! “ followed by, “I can’t believe I ever loved u, never text me again you piece of shit!” because he took more than a minute to reply or never replied.
10. Sleeps with somebody we would regret: Could be with him, could be a random. Either way, it’s usually crap. And it doesn’t help
If you know you know… we have all been there and done it. These 10 post-break up routines are a normal thing aren’t they?