Ramadan, the annual fasting month for Muslims all over the world is upon us, whilst many Muslims are happy it’s approaching, because of the innumerable amount of blessings it provides, other Muslims may not be so keen on it because of the imminent and inevitable digital torture ahead.
Every year, Muslims on twitter are tormented with high resolution pictures of mouth-watering meals, all in the name of bants. Don’t banter me with pictures of fufu and goat meat and light soup and expect me to take it lightly, my mouth is watering, just typing this, imagine what it’ll do me if I see high-res picture of it.
The other thing is pornographic pictures, also getting thrown at you like confetti ONLY when you are fasting. I would enjoy it any other day but come on guys, you have 11 whole months to be an asshole, why do you choose this one? Sidebar: how come you cheap asses have enough bundle to tweet quality images only during Ramadan? No, I really want to know.
Then there is this urge to provoke people unnecessarily during Ramadan because they can’t get violent, but what they don’t know is, you’re allowed to hit back after breaking your fast, You can annoy me at 1:30pm, I break my fasting at 6:15pm and I’m at your door at 6:17pm waiting to dislocate your jaw and anything else that can be dislocated, don’t make anyone do that to you, you will need that jaw to eat the fufu you’re going to be tweeting at me (LOL jk, I wish I was that strong).
You Muslims can just stay off social media for your religion, social media is no respecter of feelings and I doubt it’s about to start this month. Seriously, you deserve everything you get. (I bet you thought I was going to be on your side the whole time, but where’s the fun in not being a hypocrite).
But..but… on behalf of everybody, we will like to wish all Muslims a Ramadan Mubarak and we will be here on the last day of fasting to send you “I miss you texts” in hopes of getting invited to the meatings.